Wednesday, January 18, 2006

In which I use the word "kindred" like 75 times.

I am a girly girl. I love dressing up. Hair, makeup, and fashion rock my face off. I have been tres feminine for much of my life, to the chagrin of my father who often wondered aloud, "where did my tomboy go?" as if I were ever going to fall in that category. I was no less girly in my early reading choices. Did I rock Little House on the Prairie? YOU BET. Nancy Drew? CHECK. Anne of Green Gables. ALL EIGHT OF THEM. BOO-YAH!

The last set was the most enjoyable for me. I used to love how everyone Anne liked was her "kindred spirit." Maybe it takes a certain personality, but I have known several people with whom I have felt that instant connection. That's how I felt about my high school chicas. That's how I felt about my first roomie and later Maid of Honor. It's not always instant. Some friends have been harder if not downright difficult to get to know. But no matter how it happens, it is a necessary delight of life to know people with whom we feel that kindred connection, and no less for myself than anyone. That's why my lunch today is making me so happy.

A couple of weeks ago, a woman from the church choir called me and asked if I would help her with a youth group event. She was understaffed with chaperones and wondered if I or my husband might be interested. She ended up filling the slots before we could get back with her, but we had the best conversation, and she said she'd like to go to lunch with me sometime. Today it finally worked out for us to take our lunch date and we hit up the Ram's Head Tavern because she'd never been and I knew it would be solid. Plus they have yummy spiced fries. MUST HAVE FRIES. ANYWAY, we ordered our ales and burgers and poured forth our life stories and struggles to each other like we'd been friends for years. Despite the fact that I've done that with countless people by this point in my life, I never cease to be amazed at that process. "Hello, how are you? I hated coconut as a kid, too!"

It's not typical to feel such a connection across our differences. She's about ten years older than I, has two kids and a masters in education. But she's got her own religious past like mine, a journey of identity on which she's traveled, struggles in her marriage, and a lot of hard times through which she worked and learned. So a mentor? Maybe. A friend with whom I spend time in geographic proximity (unlike so many of you dear souls)? I hope so! Where would I be without my kindred spirits?

3 comments:

Mair said...

Yay! I was happy to read this! You've been needing someone nearby to come along, and I hope this continues into a wonderful friendship....but I hope it will never be as wonderful as ours (even though I know I was one of those "downright difficult to get to know" friends) because I would be jealous. I'm still childish sometimes. Nonetheless, I'm truly happy that you had a great lunch with a great woman!


and....I miss our breakfasts in MAP!!!! WAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!

Plankiest said...

Oh yay!

So I know that we are not kindred spirits. YET! Hey, we may actually get a medal for being kindred spirits-in-the-making and taking so damn long at it. That would be cool.

Don Quixote said...

I know just what it is like to meet someone and instantly know that she is a kindred spirit. It happened in 1999 when a teenager cried the first time she talked to me...