Thursday, September 28, 2006

Soprano You Aren't

"Though you sit as squarely in the section as you can, you are NOT a soprano, and I feel it's time to inform you of that. You pinch every note you hit above an A. You positively squeak out anything above high C. YOU MUST STOP SQUEAKING.

"There's nothing wrong with switching sections. Altos are so underrated and their harmony can be quite lovely. And don't worry about the sight-reading - you aren't doing such a hot job already, so you can warble along while listening to the rest of the section just as easily with them. Really."

File this under really Mean Things I WISH I Had Said Tonight. Thankfully, I didn't utter a peep, despite the multitudinous and off-key peeps I heard from them. The tension is bottling up, though, and with Handel's Messiah pieces on the menu this season, I don't know how much longer I can internalize the desire to forcibly remove them from the section. Carry on . . .

2 comments:

der Panzerkardinal said...

That's amazing. Are you singing in a choir?? I should forward your comments to the director of the ND Liturgical Choir. The women's intonation is obnoxiously flat, much to the disappointment of my high expectations of any Notre Dame choral ensemble.

Don Quixote said...

There's a reason those women are in the soprano section. They don't know how to sing harmony. Thus, they sit in the soprano section so as to sing melody most of the time. I have to admit that as a tenor, I WISH we carried the melody!